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Relationship Problems-Can’t Eat Your Cake

relationship problems

Relationship Problems – I Want You But I Don’t Want You


Relationship problems may be what you have. Are you in a relationship where you are taken for granted? Where one day,you are made to feel wanted and the next it’s like you don’t matter. Well, if you are in a similar situation , you have relationship problems. Don’t feel worthless because you can beat this. Many couples go through relationship problems. Just read my story and maybe you will be able to identify.

The man who told me this is not your house, you did not contribute money to buy it that I should leave still makes a play for me. Sorry to disappoint but I don’t play those types of games. When I met this Joker, he was living with his mom and didn’t have jack. The house we now live in was bought after we were married so technically, I am part owner considering the fact that he was working for both of us at the time of the purchase. My name may not be on the deed but, still that doesn’t mean anything.

The man who said you must leave. Leave? Is he nuts. Then he must be bonkers. Honey, my mama ain’t raise no fool. Why would I pack up and leave to go pay rent elsewhere on my little salary and leave his cheap ass self in the big house with my 4 kids? Then he gonna turn around and say well, she left. Next thing I’m slapped with marriage abandonment. And, do you know what? end up losing more than I can afford. So I am not ready to leave. Friends say, I should leave. I know they mean well but, for me that’s not an option right now. Besides, I clearly remember a better or for worse clause, so I’m all in.

The man who once called me an ass hole says he can do better. I don’t know who fools this man but whomever it is, is great at it. Gone are the days, when it was my mother say. I mean the poor sap would run everything by his mama dearest and come back with my mother say. Now you know, this had to stop.Well, it did until sis took over.

The man who said in the presence of my kids “there are quality women on my job much better than you. One of my kids’ said, “yo, he violate.”(Between, you and me one such woman exposed herself to him in a text message and he gave me the phone to get rid of the image.) Guess he forgot. And there, I am saying to myself, if that’s what he means by quality then, he’s an all time Dotard. The world’s biggest foo fool.

I’m telling you if I was not a strong person I would be a gonna by now. But, thank God I am very strong have enough self confidence and faith in a higher power so, whatever he throws at me just bounces off like water on a leaf. Like my mother used to say, what doesn’t kill strengthens. And,I am living proof of that. There is nothing he can do or say that would cause me to go mad because I don’t think there’s nothing else left on his exhausted list.

How quickly some people forget or pretend to forget. And in case you are wondering about him jumping into my bed. Hell no! nothing happened. I told him leave or I will leave, that, I am not about to get a disease. He didn’t say a word but moved to the foot of the bed. Of all the nerve!

He should know by now that you can’t have your cake and eat it too. Well I never. Anyways, when he saw that I meant business because I was making my way out of bed; he did like a banana and split.

Is not that I complain bout anything at all. But, when my friends ask how is home life I am not gonna lie nor sugar coat the truth. I tell them the truth because they ask. Then they say, why don’t you leave?Well for starters, shelters are not appealing and renting an apartment among other things right now is not doable money wise. Besides, they don’t have room for my kids and I and I can’t see myself living with friends. Maybe a short visit yes but, staying indefinitely calls for disaster.

There have always been this constant tension yet, more quarreling, less civil talk, and he behaving like a Macho man and other times little boy blue. Can you imagine being married to a man who still acts like he’s single. He gets invited to a party and he goes by himself. He wouldn’t even ask and give you the chance to say “I’m not going” or he will remark like a little kid, “this is mines”. Never ours. For example, he says, “this is my house”. Yet, when its time to clean or repair, his tongue changes to “it’s our house”.

Can you imagine being married to a man who wants to be wife, mother,dictator but not the man you want him to be? He wants to make all decisions and run them by me and expect me to go along. He makes the groceries and one time remarked that I don’t need money there’s food in the house. He will buy brown curtains and ask me if I like them? It’s like I am just there to be ridden like a donkey and breed his children. Not once in this twenty plus years of marriage did this man ever say, here’s some money go buy yourself something nice or go spend it on the house or the kids. Never! He either never has any money or always has some excuse lame oh.

Thank God for college because when I started college credit cards became my friends. The bad thing about these cards is that they landed me into debt which I have yet to recover from but, that’s a whole other story.

This man believes that because he asks a question and I respond that things are alright. No, Hosea,they are not. To him, it’s like the perfect excuse to start a banging. This leaves me wondering what happened to all those cheating feats? Do we just sweep them under the rug for now until you ready to cheat again? What happen to leave my house and go?

I don’t understand what makes some men think that because one is cool,calm, and collective that it’s an excuse to take advantage. Why misjudge these characteristics for stupidity? Well, I often wonder because I am not Dotish.
I have gotten so used to his ways, that I sort of like things the way they are now. People say, get counseling for relationship problems; but, there’s no pressure no stress. I’m just taking it one day at a time. No kind of botheration, if there’s such a word. When people like him act the way he does it’s like laying down some ground rules that I sort of take my cues from. I can come in when I want,spend the whole day in bed if I want. Heck! do what I please when I please no questions asked. A life with no fussing. Before it was an issue not cleaning his crocodile toes or cutting his hair. Now there is no noise about you don’t spend time with me you don’t do this and that. He comes and goes as he pleases, continues to act like he’s single and I have come to accept that so its kind of okay for me and my relationship problems. Talk about having your cake and eating it too.

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