You can save marriage from divorce if you change the way you think about marriage in the first place. Marriage is supposed to be a partnership. That’s why you got married, right? You found someone you thought you would spend the rest of your life with, have 2.3 children and a house with a white picket fence.
Whose fault is it that it didn’t turn out that way? Yours? Your partner’s? Does it matter? Good marriages don’t just happen. You have to learn how to be married. If you do not learn how to be married, then you need to learn how to be divorced. If you don’t want that, you just need to fix it.
If things have gotten out of control and the lines of communication are down, stop what you are doing and take control back. Too often, couples just let the marriage happen when in reality marriage takes some effort to be successful. If you don’t work at it and nurture it, you will lose it.
The most effective way to work things out is to talk them out. Concentrate on clearing up any misconceptions and misunderstandings that have crept in under the radar. Reopen the lines of communication now. Don’t wait any longer or the only ones who will be communicating will be the divorce lawyers. Figure out and learn to fix the problem areas together and together you can save marriage from divorce.
The love you felt for each other once is probably still there, it is just buried under a heap of overdue bills, the never ending housework, not enough time spent together, kids running you ragged, and flat out exhaustion. Not quite the fairy tale you dreamed of when you were young, is it? It may not be, but you can get some semblance of that original fairy tale to come true at any time in your marriage.
After you take the time to talk things out and clear up any misconceptions or misunderstandings then it is time to start making a plan on how to fix your relationship. Make a budget you can live on. Spend more time together by planning a date night every week. Ask that a family member help you out with running the kids to school or practice a couple of times a week, have dinner together as a family as often as you can, leave that last load of laundry or just rinse the dishes and let them be until the morning, watch an earlier newscast so you can go to bed earlier than usual and get more sleep.
There is a very well known talk show host who once said, “If you want to make changes in your life, you have to make changes in your life.” The same can be said for your marriage. Sit down together and figure out what needs to be changed and then learn how to change them. The sooner you do make the changes the sooner you can save marriage from divorce.
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